Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Weekends get Crazier with Warmer Weather

Well the scale yet again HATES me!  I have not lost anything and I stuck with my treadmill work outs all last week, I do think allot of it has to do with PMS, because I always put on a couple pounds right before my monthly & I'm praying it comes today or tomorrow so when I weigh in at W.W. on Thursday I will be lighter.  Trust me it is very true, I have always put on poundage before my Aunt Flo, OK, enough about that.

I had a very crazy busy weekend schedule and even though it is nice, since it is the only full days that I get with my kids I truly want them to go as slow as possible (Other then no work too).  Our next couple weekends are filled with stuff too.  This past Saturday besides the usual dance class for Addisyn, all five of us had dentist appointments to get our pearly whites cleaned and then I took all three kiddo's to Target with me and then we went to Cleats to have dinner with my brother & his two kids and my mom & then Sam & her Co-worker.  My sister lives in Colorado but she is in Pittsburgh (nice City) till end of this week so since it is only an 1.5 hour drive they came to see us, it was nice. Got home and put the kids to bed and I cracked open a Bud Light (We have a love/hate relationship) and relaxed. The night before we had a fire with my neighbors Ron & Chrissy.  Sunday I did laundry and some cleaning all morning until about 12:15 when I left to go have lunch with my friend Amy which we have been friends since Pre-schoool.  It was really nice chatting with her for hours.  Then came home switched up the laundry and sat for about 5 mins and that is when I realize I should have never done that, because it hit me and I was exhausted.  I then left for my softball game at 5 pm and we won 17-14, wahoo.  I got home and bathed the kids and put them to bed and finished up laundry.  I was so completely out if by the time I went to bed.

Oh, and about said softball game I have realized how much I cannot run.  Now, even when I was skinny and in very athletic shape I was never a very fast runner, I am more of a distance and endurance runner.  Give me miles to go and I can do it at my own pace, I will finish and finish strong.  But running bases is sprinting and I AM NOT or never was a sprinter, so fast forward to this year and being severally obese and try sprinting... Not happening. I feel like I'm moving, but I know in reality and what everyone else sees is what probably looks like I'm walking.  I notice when I to sprint down the baseline my ankles always go other ways then they should.    Twice I was on first base and the guy behind me (that fastest one & probably youngest on the team) would hit it over the outfielders heads and what should have been home runs for him, turned into only doubles thanks to my overweight, obese ass!  It is embarrassing in a way and I have no one to blame but myself, but it kinda puts this extra worry/weight on the mind and makes me wish when I come to bat that I pop out or get out every time.  I know that is very negative for me to think and I would like to change my thinking and go to positive, but it's hard when you truly know the truth.  Well it'll be the same thoughts on Friday & Sunday again this week as I take the field.  I normally really didn't worry about what others think, OK maybe I did worry and it would upset me inside, but I won't show it.  I am just so scared people are thinking "OMG, look at the fat ass, whale." Honestly that makes me tear up thinking about that because when I was pregnant with Jake towards the end of my pregnancy a car of young kids yelled something to me about a whale and that is very hurtful and I about gave up right there.

So in regards to my thinking above I came home from work yesterday and I talked myself out of and into working out several times and there was more times that I favored not doing it.  After rethinking how I felt at my game and the pizza I had for dinner last night, after I put the kids to bed I went down stairs and got on the treadmill.  It was a very rough run all the muscles in my legs hurt and were tightening up plus my shins were hurting and my feet felt like they had cement weights on them.  I was doing the 60 min treadmill work out and I told myself just stop at 30 minutes and be happy you got that in, but when it came to 30 minutes I said ok, just go to 45 now and then when I reached 45 I told myself you only have 10 more minutes of running and the rest is just walking, so you've got this and next thing I know I completed my 60 minutes workout.  My body hurt, my back was very sore, but I did it and shortly after that was in bed, and it was a rough night of tossing & turning but maybe because I was still hurting a little.  I'm feeling better today, my legs a a little stiff and sore, but I AM going to get on the treadmill tonight and I will do it before the kids go to bed so I can watch NCIS at 8 pm tonight.  This is of course after I run to the store to get stuff for DH because he's been home sick & was out Saturday night till 4:30am & so was useless Sunday, WHATEVER!

OK, that is all for now.  I have to run.  I will get with you later!!!!!  Until next time...........

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